Captain Wardobe Must Die (2008)

Watch entire Movie on the dreaded YOUTUBE: Captain Wardrobe Must Die

"After trying to sit through 10 minutes of Captain Wardrobe, I found myself wishing that I had downloaded a virus instead of this movie. It is the cinematic equivalent of AIDS. I'd rather drag my dick through a mile of broken glass than see another 60 seconds of this audiovisual tripe."

comment by crapspray on Pirate Bay












Mirroring real life events. after a chance meeting an inept film maker seizes upon the opportunity to make a documentary about the comeback of the equally inept and unstable nineties underground techno legend Captain Wardrobe.

The opportunistic film maker offers to make the film if he can collaborate on Wardrobe's sure fire hit comeback album, however all attempts to do something constructive are hampered by alcohol & Wardrobes need to manipulate every situation on camera. Frustrated by failure the relationship begins to break down resulting in anger, paranoia and violence as the two men see the camera as the only means to express their dissatisfaction with life in 21st century Britain.

Production Notes

First time film makers Roger Armstrong and Paul Cobbin take viewers on a dark, episodic and uncomfortably funny journey into a growing British underground of talented people disenfranchised by society and trapped in dead end jobs or unemployment. Crushed by a pre programmed idea of inevitable failure and impossible to realise dreams the strain of an 'ordinary' life proves too much for some.

Filmed over the course of a year in spare time, on a micro budget and largely improvised without a script Captain Wardrobe Must Die is an honest, idiosyncratic and truly independent film.

Directed, Edited & Photographed by Roger Armstrong.
Written & Produced by Roger Armstrong & Paul Cobbin.
Additional Material by Liam Fender and Peter Routledge.
Music by Paul Cobbin

Featuring: Paul Cobbin Roger Armstrong Liam Fender Peter Routledge

Length 74mins 30 Seconds 23 Frames
Year of Production 2008
Original Format Mini DV
Country of Origin/Region UK/North East England

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Further Notes by Paul Cobbin [Captain Wardrobe]:

(Indie DIY micro budget documentary)

This movie is an art-house mockumentary. Several scenes are the result of melding fact & fiction, and an improvisation of live theatre in real situations.

Some criticisms made of this film have already proved very interesting: "It's very hard to watch, Its just watching an annoying pissed up idiot..." etc etc. Alluding to some of the strange traits in 'modern society' that Roger & I have observed & discussed in length. For instance: a character on screen behaves badly or is annoying, this somehow means that the film itself is badly made or lacking in some element which somehow proves the concept of professionalism.

Our intentions for film to be art-house documentary meant that hand held camera and abstract, bitty, confusing, editing techniques lent itself to the films overall feel. The editing process was actually the most discussed element in the production of this movie. Everytime new 'performances' were added it thus changed the whole feel of the film. Scenes were dropped while others were added, thus creating a collage of improvisation and scripted events. The film actually moved through different phases...from a introduction to the Wardrobe character as a Ranting drunk, Rogers first meeting at his attic flat & the Party that the director is lead to believe is the celebration of a new album by Wardrobe...through various interviews, shots of performances to nobody/apathetic crowds at Bars buskers nights, to Roger losing his grasp on what he is about, driving around planning murders for fun, through to the burning of the Zebra jacket, which is symbolic of the death of the manipulative and abusive alter-ego...

There is a fake last scene before the 'credits'...the film actually ends after the credits, and show a monologue read out by the talking Wardrobe head: 'Happiness is sad' - heard as the 1st track on the Renegade Pharmacy - Trauma Diaries album. [streamed from here]

I agree that the film is fairly difficult to watch. But, in response to the many comments made so far, have to argue that it is somewhat ignorant for someone to judge a piece of film as 'art' or 'entertainment' purely based on the main characters ability to be annoying, frustrating, an ego maniac etc.

These self-observed character traits, both done by Myself & Roger Armstrong were why the film was made. On my Part speaking as the person who played the part of 'Captain Wardrobe' in a half-real / half joking - realtime acting/playful/improvised manner, it was in that reality while the camera recorded, an attempt to analyse my own perceived character flaws using acting as a performance based form of therapy. Using film playback to try to discern and distinquish & capitalise on my own manipulative urges & addictions.

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Review: Brett Gerry

Captain Wardrobe Must Die (2008; dir. Roger Armstrong)

"I hate that shitty office job in IT, says this film's main character, modestly played by helmer Armstrong, "I'd rather work in the media." This blank-faced confession, wrought by the fictionalised Armstrong during the filming of this semi-fictionalised documentary, reveals the heart of Captain Wardrobe Must Die, and the nature of many conversations, images and scenarios explored throughout its length. The silent desperation of its characters - so eager to become part of an accepted success path that they forget who they are, adopting alter egos or paranoid fixations to cover their apathy - mirrors the aspirations and disappointments of a million wannabe filmmakers, musicians and artists of all kinds. So it's fitting that Armstrong adopts a style and technique that distances himself and his film from its subject.

Displaying an uncanny knack for associational editing, Armstrong cuts-up and tumble-drys his footage - creating flash-forwards that never pay-off, and a staccato rhythm that forces the viewer to question the reality of what they're seeing. Similarly, the North East locations - many of which were coincidentally employed in our Act2Cam feature Beanz - are rendered in a haunting, almost futuristic way, and seem, despite title cards that concrete both month and year, to be ghosts from the future, echoing the chronological nervousness of the film.

There's always the danger that any independent project becomes marred by the inflated egos of its originators. Here, Armstrong manages to sidestep that issue by embracing liberating improvisational techniques loathed by the majority of media professionals - eschewing pre-written scenes in favour of on-location ad-libbing - and by allowing the machismo inherent in many male filmmakers' understanding of the cinematic spectacle to be cruelly but justly invalidated in several key scenes, suggesting, like All This Time (2009; dir. Kris N.) or It's Nick's Birthday (2009; dir. Graeme Cole) - reviewed here and here - that successful, alternative film projects must employ not only alternative cinematic practices but an honest process of self-exploration within the filmmaker.

Captain Wardrobe Must Die is rather unsurprisingly - not listed on the IMDb

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